Working On Me

In my post about goals or dreams, I suggested that you should make your goals public by talking to people about them. To supplement your face-to-face discussions, why not publish your goals in a blog?

You can then try to maintain an on-line record of what you do to get nearer to achieving the goals, what works, what doesn't, and encourage people to contribute their own ideas.

I haven't posted on the blog for over a week now, mostly because I've been transfixed by the Olympic Games TV coverage. At the same time I've been enjoying the sport, a certain guilt has been eating away at me that things I ought to be doing (including the blog) aren't getting done.

But then, the Olympic Games happen once in four years. Everyone in the house watches the sports and cheers and it brings us all together in a way that few things do. And so I have decided I can live with the guilt. Normal service will be resumed, but not today.

I've only just realised that earlier this week I passed my blog's first anniversary. I'm really proud that I've managed to sustain the blog this far, and that I've managed to attract a small regular readership. To those of you who've commented on posts, a big thank you. Feedback is always motivational, and I value every comment greatly. To those who just read, thanks to you, too, whoever you are. I hope you've managed to take something from my thoughts and ideas.

Often, we are advised to face challenges and work through issues by writing about how we feel in a journal. I'd certainly advocate that as worthwhile, because once you've cleared the air and got those feelings down on paper, I find that they stop eating away at you. It can be as though you have pulled them from your mind and trapped them on the paper, and that's a great result.

However, there comes a time when enough is enough and when what's lacking is a little positivity. Just like you can smile yourself into a good mood, you can write your way into a positive attitude, or confidence, or relaxation. Simply write about some or all of these topics:

1. What am I grateful for?
2. What am I looking forward to?
3. If things go well for me, how will I feel next week/month/year?
4. What nice things do people say about me?
5. Who do I love and why?
6. What are my greatest achievements this year/this decade/in my life?

You will end the writing session smiling and feeling warm and confident, which could be enough to make a big difference to the outcomes of your day.

Something you can use to breathe a little life into a journal you're bored with is to be your own guest writer. Blogs often feature guest writers who offer a different perspective. You can do the same.

Simply write from someone else's point of view. If your journal is one in which you describe the events of the day and your reactions to them, then do as you normally do, but pretend you are someone else, possibly one of the people you encountered that day. What did that person notice about you? What impression did you make?

On the other hand, you may have a journal in which you simply write whatever comes into your head, snippets of philosophy, ideas and memories. In that case, consciously try to record ideas which are not yours, imaginary memories another person might have, or views which are different from your own.

When a blog features a guest writer, it can actually revitalise the blog in a big way. The blog owner picks up new themes to write about or acquires new energy, and sometimes it can entirely change the direction of the blog. What could it do for your journal?

I have written before about how and why to journal and how to sustain your writing once you have started. But a question on a forum made me consider another angle recently: what happens when you have neglected your journal for a period and want to restart? Perhaps you entered a busy period and your journal fell by the wayside, or perhaps you just lost interest. For whatever reason, you want to make a fresh start.

The thought of cataloguing all that has gone on since you stopped recording your life is likely to be daunting and may put you off starting again. But you can’t just launch in again as if nothing has happened either. What I suggest is this:

1. Take a blank sheet of paper – not a page in your journal.
2. Divide the sheet into sections by drawing lines. If it’s been just a few months since you stopped, then each space represents a month. If it’s been years, each space represents a year.
3. Write the names of the months or the years in each space and then write one or two bullet points of notable events from that month or year. Don’t add any detail – just use a word or two or a memory trigger.
4. Tuck the completed sheet in your journal.

Now, start writing in your journal again regularly. Once a week (or whenever you feel like it, or have the time), pick one of your months or years and write up the events as you remember them. As you record your memories, cross them off on the sheet. Before long, there will be nothing left on the sheet and you will be back to journaling in the normal way.

There’s a lot of information on ‘monetising’ your blog. It seems you can make a little cash from your readers in various ways, selling them your own products or inviting them to click buttons or ads so other people can sell them things.

I can see why people use their blogs as a source of income in this way, but it’s not for me. I use the blog to share my thinking and to pass on little tips I have benefited from or am just starting to use. I have learned an enormous amount from other people's blogs, and continue to learn from them every day. I hope there are people who can learn from what I post here.

I don’t really have much of an idea who is or will be reading my posts (other than the few who have commented, bless you) but whoever you are:

• I don’t really have anything to sell you
• I think there’s probably enough advertising in your life already
• I want nothing from you except maybe the odd bit of feedback

Often, it can be hard to sustain writing in a diary. Perhaps you get suddenly busy and lose any possibility of spare time, or perhaps it seems that nothing interesting is going on. Maybe you just forget to write a few days in a row and then the momentum is lost. There are ways to guard against this:

1. Try to develop the habit of writing at the same time every day, say first thing in the morning, or last thing at night. If you’re working, could you devote a few minutes to this in your lunch break?
2. Don’t beat yourself up about making an entry every day; if circumstances mean just one or two entries a week, that’s fine. You can increase or decrease the frequency of entries as you like.
3. Unless your PC is always with you and ready to go, use pen and paper, and keep them with you all the time if you can so you can snatch writing opportunities as they arise.
4. Use a plain paper book rather than a pre-printed diary, because you might want to write a lot some days, a little on others and sometimes nothing at all.
5. If you get stuck with nothing to write, just write yourself a question, take a breath and write down some answers to it. I’ve included some prompt questions to get you started at the end of this post.
6. Think what it would be like if you had started a year ago. Imagine all the detail you would be able to go back and read.
7. If you do lapse for a period, don’t consider the whole thing a failure. When you’re ready, simply turn to a new page, write the date and start going again.

Look forward to the time when you will be able to look back and find out what you were doing and how you were feeling a year ago or ten years ago. What memories you are preserving for your future, or for your children.

Diary prompts

• How am I feeling right now and why?
• What was the best thing that happened today?
• What is worrying me?
• How will I spend the coming weekend?
• What ambition have I had for a long time?
• Who are the people that matter to me and why?
• What is my earliest memory?
• Where have I travelled and what did I see or do there?
• If I could do anything with my life, what would I do?
• If I won or inherited a fortune, what would I do with it?
• What values do I want my children to hold?
• How will I celebrate my next major birthday?
• What would my ideal holiday be like?