Working On Me

It's an old cliché that everyone has a book inside them, but there is an element of truth to the idea. At the very least, we could all write a book called, "Important Things I Have Learned In My Life".

An interesting idea is to write an outline of your version of this book. What are the main chapter headings? Will you organise it chronologically from childhood to the present, or by topic? What will be the key points in each chapter?

In late July of 2005, I was in Mumbai, India. The day after I arrived there, the city was devastated in a record-breaking monsoon. In 24 hours, nearly a meter of rain fell on the city. Homes were washed away, people were stranded and separated from their families, food and water supplies ran low and there were thousands of deaths.

I was in a comfortable hotel throughout the incident, but I felt its effects. The work I was in Mumbai to do was cancelled, and the airport was closed. I was due to return home the following Saturday, but it was by no means certain that my plane would be able to fly from the airport. When the day came, I called to check, and all the signs were good. I packed and presented myself at the airport, where the sweltering heat combined with the presence of thousands of delayed passengers made for an uncomfortable atmosphere. Even in the first class departure lounge, tempers were frayed.

And so when our flight was cancelled and the airline representative toured the lounge, breaking the news to us each personally, she met with much unpleasantness and rage. When she came to talk to me, I listened, asked politely what would happen next and thanked her for letting me know. She seemed surprised that I didn't want to shout at her. In truth, I was as frustrated as everyone else there, but I wasn't going to take it out on someone who wasn't to blame.

After an hour or so during which I called my wife and explained what was going on and started to explore other options of getting out of the country (there were very few and they were very expensive), I felt a light touch on my elbow, and the airline representative urgently whispered in my ear, "Mr Blake, please come with me quickly and quietly – and bring your bags." She had worked hard to secure a small number of seats on another plane that was leaving, and I was the first customer she decided to put on that plane. Those who had ranted were not so lucky. I heard later that most hadn’t got out for another five days.

I was nice to the woman because it was the right thing to do. At the time, I didn't believe there was anything to be gained from being nice, but it turned out to gain me a benefit far beyond what money could have bought me. I continue to be as nice as I can to everyone, whatever may beset and frustrate me, not seeking reward, but knowing it will surely come anyway.

Some people seem to accumulate achievements effortlessly. It is true that there is a snowball effect at work; the more you achieve, the more you view yourself as an achiever. The more you believe you are an achiever, the easier you find it to achieve things and the more you achieve.

The converse holds true as well. If you don’t see yourself as an achiever, you’ll find it hard to achieve anything, which feeds your view of yourself as a non-achiever and the cycle continues.

But the fact is that you are an achiever. You are reading this blog, which means you have already accumulated a phenomenal number of achievements. For instance, you have:

• Learned to read
• Learned to use a computer
• Secured some kind of income to allow you web access
• Decided to make your life better

These are achievements not to be sneezed at, and there are hundred like them in your life. You can prove it to yourself quite easily. Take a few sheets of paper, one for each ten years of your life so far. Head each with the appropriate ages (0-10, 11-20, 21-30, etc.) If you aren’t yet thirty, then choose five-year periods instead (0-5, 6-10, 11-15, etc.)

Next, focus on each sheet in turn and list all your achievements during the period the sheet covers. These achievements can be big (“Passed 8 GCSEs”, “Learned to walk”, “Was promoted to first management job”) or small (“Passed cycling proficiency test”, “Won 800m race at school sports day”, “Asked to represent office at regional awards day”.) But they must all be positive. When you think you’ve got enough, challenge yourself to double the number recorded on each sheet. Let your mind wander through all ages, and be imaginative.

Then write up your sheets. Many people get a special notebook for this, but you can use loose leaf paper if you like. When you transfer the achievements from the original sheets, try to organise them in chronological order. When you have finished, this will represent the start of your Achievement Log. On the next blank page, draw two columns, headed ‘date’ and ‘achievement’.

Every day, try to write at least one achievement – big or small – in your Achievement Log. It could be an achievement at work or at home, in your relationships, your finances or fitness or in any other area. If you can write several in a day, do so.

Every week, set aside some time to review your Achievement Log. When you face a challenge, review it again. The aim is to create the belief that you are an achiever. This should be easy to believe, because it is true, and you will have plenty of evidence right in front of you.

Once you believe that you are an achiever, you will find it comparatively easy to achieve more and more in all aspects of your life.

Now that my fortieth birthday has passed, I feel entitled to buy and read 'The Oldie'.This month the Bishop of Reading has contributed an article called 'Change your life. Do nothing'. In it, he decries the bustle and activity of modern life and advocates the regular devotion of time to sitting silently and becoming attuned to things deep within us and outside of us.

Overstimulation is a given in the new century. Television, the internet and the radio compete for our attention while the ubiquitous mobile phone and email account ring, chime and buzz to demand our immediate attention. In all of this noise, is our internal voice ignored or shouted down?

I am off to find a comfortable chair. 

The latest craze in spiritual self-help is the phomenon they call 'The Secret'. It's a DVD, a book, a series of workshops and lots more besides. It's based around the so-called 'law of attaction' which is sometimes called the 'cosmic ordering system'.

The basic principle is this: concentrate on what you want, act as if you already have it, and the universe will rearrange itself so that you actually do. It's a nice idea, of course, and the producers of 'The Secret' even bring in some 'experts' to give a pseudo-scientific explanation of how it works (although not one a real scientist would recognise or give credence to.)

The thing is that it can work, in the same way that affirmations or visualisations work: internally. It's not the universe doing all this, but your own subconscious mind. If you persist in a belief that you own a thing and you actually don't, your subconscious will set about driving your actions so that eventually you do.

It seems to me a sad and cynical world view that robs the technique of any personal power and replaces it with new age loopiness.